hunger and thirst

Love hurts. It's scary. It requires trust. Real love is hard and a lot of work.

How do you keep a relationship strong? Some would say "We just keep falling in love."

The God of heaven is inviting me to keep falling in love with Him. He attaches a promise to that invitation, a promise of a blessing. Its the blessing I've been craving. When I desire God more than anything, when we commit with our lives to keep falling in love, He comes and fills up our hearts.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, because they will be filled. Matthew 5:6

We live in a society where many of us never hunger or thirst for anything. We never allow ourselves to physically experience either one. We dirve through a fast-food restaurant just before we think we might have a hunger pang. So this idea of feeling desperate for food or drink already seems weird.

To hunger and thirst for the righteousness of God is to desire Him more than anything. It is longing for His consistent presence and His input in your life, just like my consistent need for food.

So, how do I grow close to God? By choosing daily to deny myself something that is permissible but not beneficial. By making this intentional sacrifice for the sole purpose of growing closer to God. After all, Jesus himself said, "If anyone would come after me, he must denyhimself and take up his cross daily and follow me" Luke 9.23

But self-control is hard. We don't like to deny ourselves. But there is another level of self-control that too few are able to find. "So I say, live by the spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature" Galatians 5:16 In other words, live with the willingness to walk away when the Holy Spirit nudges you and says, "The food choice is permissible but not beneficial - so don't eat it."

So the obvious question is how can we tune into theses nudges of the Holy Spirit? "Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in touch with the Spirit." Galatians 5:25 We read the Bible with the intention of putting into practice what we read while asking the Holy Spirit to direct us in knowing how to do this.

Its not easy.It's not easy relying on the Holy Spirit to direct us into wise choices. It's not easy to dare to actually live a life in which we put Scripture to action. Especially Scriptures about self-control. It's not easy but it is possible.

new year

Well it's a new year which means resolutions. My favorite definition of resolution is "reduction to a simpler form; conversion." I don't like the traditional idea of making a change at new years, so I don't usually take on a major change.

I think my "resolve" to make a change this year just coincidentally seems to be happening over the beginning of the year.

Our church is doing a sermon series called "roll the dice." Pastor David challenges that of you've tried everything else to fulfill your life and you still feel empty or lost why not roll the dice and try God. Give God a chance to make a difference and prove your preconceived notions wrong. Initially I didn't think this series would have much of an application to me, and as usual LCBC surprised me and really spoke to my heart. They talked about giving God your journey this past Sunday. It immediately hit me; I need to be honest with myself. Recently, I heard someone say "if you want to see God laugh tell Him your plans."

My "plan" has always included God but I never wholeheartedly follow after him. I'm realizing this is a big problem in my life and my lukewarm relationship with Him has translated into a lukewarm life. I'm taking this year, to make a BIG change. I want God to make big improvements in my life. In my attitude, in my marriage, at my job, in my last semester of school and so forth.

I'm also planning some other changes but I don't think I'm going to divulge them quite yet. I think I will make more of a effort and I will be more motivated if I am doing it for me. I don't just want to have the satisfaction of telling people my goal I'm hoping they'll just see the changes in my life.

One last thing, my cousin Michelle recently wrote a New Years post about choosing one word that would define the difference you will make for yourself and other in the next 12 months. The idea came from a movement called: myoneword.org. After careful consideration I think my word will be "crave." More specifically what I choose to crave. Now I crave a job after graduation, time with my husband, cell service to use my iphone, and even food. But I want to make this year the year that I crave God before and exponentially more than anything else.

finals hiatus

finals next week, no time for posting = hiatus

thanksgiving

I am thankful for...

My SAVIOR

My loving, supportive, hard-working, husband

My mother, father, sister and brother

My grandmother and grandfather

My mother-in-law, her boyfriend, my sisters-law, my father-in-law and my grandparents-in-law

My friends from State College, from nursing school, and friends at work

My good paying, flexible, close-to-my-home, enhancing-my-education jobs

My warm, inviting, full-of-family, beutiful home

My ability to walk, run, jump, talk, scream, sing, hear, feel, smell, and taste

and soooooooooo much more
but I'm thankful for these things everyday, not just on this day of pilgram and indian celebration. So

Happy Turkey Day

holidays

I'm feeling totally bah-humbug this year. I'm not looking forward to the holidays for anything other than a few days off. I just want rest; I want complete rejuvenation over the next week and the month off for Christmas. I just need a vacation from everything.

I hate the American tradition of presents and giving. It's to much. It's just a drain on our time and money. There are thousands of impoverished people around the world in dire need of their next meal. Yesterday on the news they were talking about how empty most of the local food banks are because of the increasing number of people needing food and the decreasing number of people giving. There are many families even in our own backyard who won't have enough to feed their family over the holidays.

I think I need a total change this year. I would rather give to those who need this year and see a difference made. I want to help others instead of recieve things that I really didn't even want or need in the first place. People have been asking me what is on my list and honestly I can't think of one thing. But I can tell you what is on my heart, those who are less fortunate than me.

see the blessing

I've recently been given many opportunities to "see the blessing" in a situation that is less than satisfactory to me. How do I make myself see the positive and not immediately focus on the negative. I have a tendency to make a habit of pointing out the good in other people's circumstances but when it comes to myself my view is clouded by the bad.

God give me an attitude of gratitude because I am blessed more than I know sometimes. Thank you for the people you put in my life that show me the pros when all I can see is the cons.

Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.

Praise the Lord

So today, although it's only the first of November I already have something to be thankful for!

I called USAA (our car insurance company) to discuss the specifics of them coming to pick up my totaled car! That's right they decided fixing it was more expensive than the car's total value! Praise the Lord, Matt and I don't have to worry about fixing and selling it! They are coming today to take it off our hands and I have to say I will be so thankful to see it go!!

As many of you may know we also bought a new car this past week! It's a 2007 Nissan Versa! It's so cute but of course Matt liked it for it's price, condition, and safety rating. We spent more than half of our savings on it but we were determined to buy it the Dave Ramsey way, in cash. Well were were both excited about the new car and depending on God to hold us through any unforeseen emergencies that might require money. I will admit, I was worried about how tight we would be, but I knew God would provide.



So anyways while I was talking to the nice insurance company lady today she told the total they would be paying us for the Jetta. It was suspenseful because of course she had to "run the numbers." When she finally told me I was floored, it was almost 3 times what we were expecting!! And the amount will replace a third of what we spent on the new one! I'm just beyond amazed! Only God can provide like that!